Fred
Fred is partner in a well known accounting
firm. His income is good, he has a fine home, is happily married and the father
of promising children of college age. He has so attractive a personality that he
makes friends with everyone. If ever there was a successful business man, it is
Fred. To all appearance he is a stable, well balanced individual. Yet, he is
alcoholic. We first saw Fred about a year ago in a hospital where he had gone to
recover from a bad case of jitters. It was his first experience of this kind,
and he was much ashamed of it. Far from admitting he was an alcoholic, he told
himself he came to the hospital to rest his nerves. The doctor intimated
strongly that he might be worse than he realized. For a few days he was
depressed about his condition. He made up his mind to quit drinking altogether.
It never occurred to him that perhaps he could not do so, in spite of his
character and standing. Fred would not believe himself an alcoholic, much less
accept a spiritual remedy for his problem. We told him what we knew about
alcoholism. He was interested and conceded that he had some of the symptoms, but
he was a long way from admitting that he could do nothing about it himself. He
was positive that this humiliating experience, plus the knowledge he had
acquired, would keep him sober the rest of his life. Self-knowledge would fix
it.
We heard no more of Fred for a while. One day we were told
that he was back in the hospital. This time he was quite shaky. He soon
indicated he was anxious to see us. The story he told is most instructive, for
here was a chap absolutely convinced he had to stop drinking, who had no excuse
for drinking, who exhibited splendid judgment and determination in all his other
concerns, yet was flat on his back nevertheless.
Let him tell you about it: "I was much impressed with what
you fellows said about alcoholism, and I frankly did not believe it would be
possible for me to drink again. I rather appreciated your ideas about the subtle
insanity which precedes the first drink, but I was confident it could not happen
to me after what I had learned. I reasoned I was not so far advanced as most of
you fellows, that I had been usually successful in licking my other personal
problems, and that I would therefore be successful where you men failed. I felt
I had every right to be self-confident, that it would be only a matter of
exercising my will power and keeping on guard.
"In this frame of mind, I went about my business and for a
time all was well. I had no trouble refusing drinks, and began to wonder if I
had not been making too hard work of a simple matter. One day I went to
Washington to present some accounting evidence to a government bureau. I had
been out of town before during this particular dry spell, so there was nothing
new about that. Physically, I felt fine. Neither did I have any pressing
problems or worries. My business came off well, I was pleased and knew my
partners would be too. It was the end of a perfect day, not a cloud on the
horizon.
"I went to my hotel and leisurely dressed for dinner. As I
crossed the threshold of the dining room, the thought came to mind that it would
be nice to have a couple of cocktails with dinner. That was all. Nothing more. I
ordered a cocktail and my meal. Then I ordered another cocktail. After dinner I
decided to take a walk. When I returned to the hotel it struck me a highball
would be fine before going to bed, so I stepped into the bar and had one. I
remember having several more that night and plenty next morning. I have a
shadowy recollection of being in an airplane bound for New York and of finding a
friendly taxicab driver at the landing field instead of my wife. The driver
escorted me about for several days. I know little of where I went or what I said
and did. Then came the hospital with unbearable mental and physical suffering.
"As soon as I regained my ability to think, I went carefully
over that evening in Washington. Not only had I been off guard, I had made no
fight whatever against the first drink. This time I had not thought of the
consequences at all. I had commenced to drink as carelessly as though the
cocktails were ginger ale. I now remembered what my alcoholic friends had told
me, how they prophesied that if I had an alcoholic mind, the time and place
would come - I would drink again. They had said that though I did raise a
defense, it would one day give way before some trivial reason for having a
drink. Well, just that did happen and more, for what I had learned of alcoholism
did not occur to me at all. I knew from that moment that I had an alcoholic
mind. I saw that will power and self-knowledge would not help in those strange
mental blank spots. I had never been able to understand people who said that a
problem had them hopelessly defeated. I knew then. It was a crushing blow.
"Two of the members of Alcoholics Anonymous came to see me.
They grinned, which I didn't like so much, and then asked me if I thought myself
alcoholic and if I were really licked this time. I had to concede both
propositions. They piled on me heaps of evidence to the effect that an alcoholic
mentality, such as I had exhibited in Washington, was a hopeless condition. They
cited cases out of their own experience by the dozen. This process snuffed out
the last flicker of conviction that I could do the job myself.
"Then they outlined the spiritual answer and program of
action which a hundred of them had followed successfully. Though I had been only
a nominal churchman, their proposals were not, intellectually, hard to swallow.
But the program of action, though entirely sensible, was pretty drastic. It
meant I would have to throw several lifelong conceptions out of the window. That
was not easy. But the moment I made up my mind to go through with the process, I
had the curious feeling that my alcoholic condition was relieved, as in fact it
proved to be.
"Quite as important was the discovery that spiritual
principles would solve all my problems. I have since been brought into a way of
living infinitely more satisfying and, I hope, more useful than the life I lived
before. My old manner of life was by no means a bad one, but I would not
exchange its best moments for the worst I have now. I would not go back to it
even if I could."
Fred's story speaks for itself. We hope it strikes home to
thousands like him. He had felt only the first nip of the wringer. Most
alcoholics have to be pretty badly mangled before they really commence to solve
their problems.
Many doctors and psychiatrists agree with our conclusions.
One of these men, staff member of a world-renowned hospital, recently made this
statement to some of us: "What you say about the general hopelessness of the
average alcoholic's plight is, in my opinion, correct. As to two of you men,
whose stories I have heard, there is no doubt in my mind that you were 100%
hopeless, apart from divine help. Had you offered yourselves as patients at this
hospital, I would not have taken you, if I had been able to avoid it. People
like you are too heartbreaking. Though not a religious person, I have profound
respect for the spiritual approach in such cases as yours. For most cases, there
is virtually no other solution."
Once more: The alcoholic at certain times has no effective
mental defense against the first drink. Except in a few rare cases, neither he
nor any other human being can provide such a defense. His defense must come from
a Higher Power.
May you find Him now!
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